Saturday, November 19, 2011

had to share

this is why we are bffs. because ali does stuff like this. one year ago today we (mca and i) lost our angel baby after 42 days in the NICU. and ali remembered the day. and made this amazing video. love you.

Friday, November 18, 2011

For Allison (Anderson)

Ali here. The blonde one. Tomorrow is November 19. One year ago, my BFF Allison went through something I could never imagine. She lost a child. Sweet baby Anthon, who was 42 days old. I had the privilege of meeting Anthon, and I can tell you that I've never felt a sweeter spirit coming from anyone. This sweet tiny baby was too special to stay on this earth. I know this past year has been very hard on Allison and her family. But what the world needs to know is that I admire Allison so much. Throughout everything she's been going through, she has consistently been a true friend. Someone who is there for everyone that needs her, when they need her. Being friends with Allison has changed my life in so many ways, and I am forever indebted to her because of things she'll probably never know.

One day, shortly after Anthon passed away, I found myself in the cemetary. It was during a very hard time for me, emotionally. There had been a girl that was considering giving her child up for adoption, and was considering us as adoptive parents for her baby. I had found out that morning that she'd decided to keep it and wasn't changing her mind. It was that week, also, that it was determined the current method of fertility treatments I was on wasn't working, and it had been discontinued. My heart was aching. I went to Anthon's little gravesite and knelt down. I told him that I knew there were other little babies needing to come to Earth, that not only I would get to be a mother to, but Allison as well. I asked him to watch over those babies and care for them until the time came for them to arrive. As I knelt there, in that sacred place, I felt the most overwhelming sense of peace. I knew my words had been heard. I couldn't stop the tears of peace and joy and love from streaming down my face. It's moments like that when you realize that Heaven just isn't that far away.

As I said in the intro, I believe in kindred spirits, and Allison and I definitely are just that. I hope she knows that I will always be here for her no matter what, as she has always been there for me. Allison, I love you. I know this is a hard time, a day of remembrance. And I know that you'll be with that beautiful baby again someday.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

confused much?

well, it seems that only alison and i can keep each other straight. even after 3 years, people at school thought she had the baby in the NICU. and people at work call me on CPS calls all the time. no one (even people that know us both well - ahem, dcfs pals, husbands, and the like) still get us confused. i have been asked to make some clarification on who is who. i really want to insert some sarcasm here, but i won't. because we want you to read and enjoy our blog. so here it goes.

alison warner is blonde. she spells her name with 1 "L". she will forever now be "ali" on this blog. and because she is blonde, she will continually forget to do this and then i will have to continually remind her.

allison anderson is brunette. she spells her name with 2 "Ls". she will forever now be "allison" on this blog.

sorry we cannot accompany pictures with each post. we are technical, but not that savvy.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

check in and weekly goals - allison

oh dear. last week was not good for me at all. it started off ok, but went downhill real quick. i had some emotional thing going on - i think i posted about it previous - and that just set me off. so i tracked maybe one time last week. and i did not exercise at all. AND i gained 3 lbs. so from the start of this blog i have lost 1.4 LBS. yesterday did not go well either.

preface: i have been diagnosed with sleep apnea (yay!!!). therefore, i do not sleep well. and yesterday i thought, i am going to sleep all morning because i want to. NOT a good idea. i ended up feeling worse and had a bad attitude all day. i am beginning to think that the more i sleep, the worse i feel - cuz its all around bad sleep.

SO, with all that said. i am back on track today. had my green smoothie - and got my crazy monster to eat some as well. i am really motivated that ali tracked and was under her calorie goal all week. AND she worked out. AND she lost 5 lbs. now SHE is the rockstar. here are my goals for this week:

1. continue to track
2. try and workout 3 times - one of these days this will happen
3. nana and papa are coming to town - so my goal is to STILL stay on track. even though we like desserts and such.
4. DO NOT emotionally eat on saturday. this is anthon's 1 year anniversary of his passing away. i am trying to gear up for this day. so i really want to be able to come back next week and say that i did not emotionally eat due to remembering this tragedy.

i keep telling myself that i have been through the hardest thing that anyone can go through - losing a child. and i'm still here, a year later. i know i have had some ups and serious downs over the last year. including the top three:

1. losing and gaining 30 lbs
2. trying to end my life
3. henry being in the hospital for a week

and yet, i am still here. trying to survive. trying to get healthy. so i will try to take this week in stride. remember my angel. know that without him i wouldn't have learned so much about myself. and keep moving.

here's to a successful week. here's to not trying, but doing (physically and mentally).

Saturday, November 12, 2011

Weekend Update - Alison W

Here is a review of my week.

Food - Stayed under my calorie goal of 1590. Had a green smoothie. No soda.
Exercise - 15 minutes weight lifting, 45 minutes Dynamics class (high impact aerobics)
Food - Exceeded my calorie goal by 200 calories. No green smoothie. Had soda (diet dr pepper and diet pepsi)
Exercise - none
Food - Stayed under my calorie goal by 200. Had a green smoothie. No soda!
Exercise - 60 minute kickboxing circuit (combo of kickboxing and cardio/strength training circuits)
Food - Went over my calories by 10. Had one can of diet coke. Had a green smoothie.
Exercise - none.
Food - Stayed under my calorie goal by about 100 calories. No green smoothie.
Exercise - none.
Food - Too early to know if I'm under my calorie goal, but I'm off to a good start.
Exercise - 45 minutes of competitive soccer

And the best part: I LOST 5 LBS!!!!

So here are my stats:

Starting weight as of 11/1/11: 299 lbs
Current weight as of 11/12/11: 294 lbs
Total weight loss: 5 lbs

Here's to another great week!

Thursday, November 10, 2011

check in mid week

ugh. this week has been AWFUL. emotionally. i have been a wreck. and what happens when i am a wreck? food. food happens. cafe rio happens. DDP happens. not caring happens. i was going to ask our readers for some butt kicking advice. HOWEVER, i just read my partner in crimes post about her green smoothie experiment. and i have just been re motivated. thanks ali. i knew we started this blog for some reason... other than to go global and viral and such :)

anyone else have a green smoothie experiment or testimonial they would like to share? and/or recipes?

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Green Smoothie Day 2

On Monday I posted about trying a green smoothie for the first time. All day Monday, I felt AWESOME! I was under my calorie goal, I ate healthy all day, and didn't have even a sip of Diet Dr. Pepper. I went to the gym and got my weight lifting in and did my dynamics class! Felt great. Slept great that night!

Yesterday, Tuesday, I went to iHop for breakfast with some co-workers. I had pancakes, eggs and bacon, more calories than I should have had, FOR SURE. No green smoothie. And by 12:00, I felt like I was dying. I needed caffeine. I had a 20 oz Diet Dr. Pepper, and felt a little better for about an hour. Then for dinner, I met an old friend at a restaurant, and definitely ate more than I should have. And I had two Diet Pepsi's. I didn't exercise. Needless to say, I felt icky. As I drove home, I felt super tired, and couldn't wait to go to bed. However, when I got into bed, I couldn't sleep. Time kept ticking away, and I finally dozed off at about 2 am, only to wake up at 6:30. And I'm the kind of person that NEEDS 8 hours of sleep.

This morning I got up groggily, and made an over sized green smoothie. It was over sized kind of by accident. Either way, I drank it all. Almost immediately I started to feel more awake. Now here it is, about 4 hours later, and I feel just as good as when I drank it this morning. I'm looking forward to going to Kickboxing Circuit tonight and then lifting a few weights after!

I'm starting to think there's really something to spinach and fruit in the morning...